Other Than I Understand I

To start out this sentence with a word other than “I” is the first thought in my mind, but why?  For fear of viewing myself as a self-obsessed twit with little view of the outside world?  Isn’t that thought itself obsessive? Or is it better put, “Isn’t that thought obsessive itself?”  Who even cares because it doesn’t matter and therefore only matters.  Get inside this old tire and roll down the hill for the rest of your life with me.  We could do it forever, but I don’t think we could ever fully understand all of it on this plane.  That is why we end and go on.

For a limiting as these tiny institutions we call “letters” are, they do do an adequate job of entertaining us, do they not?  If human beings were ever to tire collectively of standardized verbal communication with understood common meanings, letters as a result would become obsolete.  The communication can exist without the letters, but could/would the letters even exist without communicating something to someone else?

Reading back the past two paragraphs, I fight the urge to label myself as pretentious and rather am sensitive to the fact that I am writing from the heart and there is no need to judge myself in any way.  Labeling things is just an attempt to understand them in the first place, that is the point of communication in the first place–to find a common understanding with another being.  We even communicate with other species and they communicate with us.  When a coyote howls, it knows that other living creatures within the vicinity of the howl are now aware of its existence.  That still being able to be reduced to a simple shared understanding.

So perhaps that’s what leads to social disorders, getting farther and farther away from each other in understanding.  And when one chooses not to communicate their feelings and experience freely, whether they know that they are choosing it or not, they do not share that understanding with another being and many times think that they are alone in this feeling.  This leads to a spiritual isolation that is the coldest pit of despair that I have ever known, but I understand I (I, my spirit that is I and all).

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